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The New Year’s Cat – Part 6

February 23, 2015

“To be honest, I need your help.”

What? I’m pretty sure I rolled my eyes at him. “You’re a cat, what could you possibly need help with other than for me to replace your kitty litter?

He sat up and glared. “Please doll, I could do that myself. I… ahem… I…”

“Finding it difficult to say. Cat got your tongue?”

He blinked at me.

Yup, I knew I was hilarious! Come on – it was right there, how could I not say it?

He blinked again. “I will not dignify that with an answer.”

Ha! He so did. That was all the response I needed. Which of course meant that I continued. “No really, you should tell me what it is, unless it’s really embarrassing of course, then you should absolutely tell me or don’t you want to let the cat out of the bag? No seriously you should tell me, come and sit over here. Mind you, there’s plenty of room here, heck enough room here to swing a cat, right? I know it’s hot in here but whatever you have to say, say it. You look as uncomfortable as if you were standing on a hot tin roof. I’m curious… as a cat. You must tell me. Will it set a cat amongst the pigeons if you do tell me your secret? I’m grinning like a Cheshire over here. Stop looking at me cat-eyed. Just tell me—”

“Please stop. Ya aint funny sweetheart.”

I grinned. Oh I was! And it was pissing him off.

A key in the lock turned and my roommate stumbled in.

“Oh, look what the cat dragged in.” God I was hilarious. The cat meowed sadly behind me.

“What is that flea bitten mongrel doing in here?” She groaned and flopped down on the couch.

“Headache?” I asked. I heard the cat jumped off the table and disappear into the kitchen.

“When did you get a cat?”

“To be fair, I don’t think you can actually get a cat. They choose you don’t they?”

“Well, why did he choose you?” She tugged off her shoes and massaged the balls of her feet. I rarely saw my roommate Sharon these days. Her job as a designer had her travelling all over the country. Wait… something was missing.

“Where’s your bag?”

“Well, yes, that’s a good question, where is my bag? My bag has been conveniently misplaced by the airline.”

“Oh no.” I headed into the kitchen to put the kettle on. She looked in desperate need of a cup of tea.

“Oh yes. On the first leg if you can believe it…”

“Didn’t you buy something in Sydney?”

“Yes. They lost it on the way back.”

“Oh hell. That’s awful Sharon.”

“Anyway, you didn’t answer my question. Where did the cat come from?

The cat in question was currently winding himself around my legs. Kiss-ass.

“I woke up and he was here.” I told her.

“Did you put up flyers? Maybe he’s lost? There might be a little girl right now crying her eyes out wondering where he is.” The statuesque blond dragged herself up off the couch until she was sitting upright and started to tug off her jacket.

I glanced down. He shook his head at me. “I don’t think so.” I told her. “I haven’t seen any posters anywhere, and he doesn’t look neglected. If anything he’s a little fat cat.”

At the glare he shot me I was hard-pressed to contain my smirk.

“Well, did you think to take him down to the shelter? Get him scanned for a chip?”

Hmmm, I hadn’t thought of that. Ouch. I looked down again. He had dug his claws into my ankle. “I should probably do that, huh?”

The kettle boiled. “Hold on to that water, hun.” Sharon said standing. “I need a shower.”

As soon as the door closed behind her my furry friend jumped up onto the bench.

“Don’t even think it, love. I aint lost, and I aint a runaway. I don’t belong to no one. Now are you going to help me or what?”



Go to Part 7


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  1. You had me rolling with this one! Oh my gosh every cat cliche possible! LOL I simply LOVE your writings 🙂

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  1. Something a little New Yearsy part 5 | Rambles, writing and amusing musings

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